Насколько я понимаю, "Клиника" - фандом нынче малопопулярный. Ну дык я и так уже хипстер с количеством своих таких непопулярных фандомов ("Числа", Лемони, Понтий Пилат, квиры...). Поэтому нехай тут будет драбблик по джейдоксу.
Снарри-любители, джейдоксы можно читать (почти) как снарри, динамика отношений очень похожа, но сами персонажи слегка отличаются.
Варнинг: он не вычитан. И он на английском.
Title: It Was Always You
Author: Megumi
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Perry Cox/J.D.
Size: drabble
Summary: Sometimes it's easier to think that Perry just does not know when to stop. Although it does seem like love.
It Was Always YouIt Was Always You
'Newbie, come here this second!' he whistles, touches his nose. He is furious.
J.D. hurries up and jumps over Janitor's mop, he runs and runs and runs, and yet somehow Perry still stands there on the horizon.
J.D. wakes up almost in tears, and his hands are trembling a little bit: this started manifesting itself only about a year ago.
'Bad dream?' he hears and lifts his face from the pillow. Perry is standing in the doorway, leaning against the wood with a glass of whiskey in his hand.
'That same one,' J.D. replies hesitantly. He knows Perry doesn't particularly like when he's "the little girl" again, but it would be stupid to deny the nightmare after waking up like this.
'Susan, why haven't you already told your pretty little subconscious that I'm not going anywhere?' he sits down at the bed and starts stroking J.D.'s hair, pulling just that little bit that makes them both smile. 'I don't plan on leaving you, not until we have enough fun together'.
'I'd love to. I have already written it in my journal,' J.D. laughs, but he is choking on the smile. 'You know, my diary. The one with the unicorn on its cover'.
'Good,' Perry nods and chugs down his whiskey, then laying down and hugging J.D.'s shoulders. 'Remember, not even a stroke could take me away. I will always be there to criticize your shitty bedside manners.'
I have always wanted to know what it was like: Perry's kisses, his hugs, his touch. We've been together for almost ten years now, and yet it still remains magical. It is pretty much like seeing a mermaid riding a unicorn.
We only first slept together after I've become an attending (...we are in no way equals - we are in fact not equal. We are UN-equals.). Before that it was a power play, mostly - or "Percival Cox's Personal Donut Delivery" LARP. Of course, we had to brown-nose - only I never thought I would want to do that, you know, literally.
Yes, Perry loves rimming.
He is also pretty jealous of me, you know. He keeps giving Turk a hard time because of our bear hugs, and he especially hates Elliott, just because on my first day I tried to befriend her.
We've been together for this long, and I still can't shake this power dynamic off of me. Don't get me wrong, I do vocalize what I don't like - and I even got Perry to limit his whiskey. I got him to wear a more or less fresh hockey jersey once in a while, I got him to sign an agreement about seeing a shrink once a year.
I was, in fact, surprised, when he let me keep my stuff: the unicorn diary, Rowdy, my tight shirts. In the closet, of course, and yet... maybe there is something about my dreamer nature that makes him smile. I prefer to think that way.
Still, we are the awkwardly smiling J.D. and Dr. Cox. Not "Perry", not all the time. Perry comes into the bedroom, and Dr. Cox leaves it.
***
'Newbie,' he moans, grabs J.D.'s fingers, squeezes them and pushes hard. He is all inside of his lover, so that his balls touch J.D.'s perineum.
'Rowdy would tell me to hit that. You know, because it's doggy-style,' J.D. laughs hoarsely from underneath Perry's figure, standing on all four. He shuts up with the next swaying movement, and then they both start cursing.
Our bedroom time is not pretty. We sweat, we curse, and we bite, and the smells can become gruesome. I mean, we are both doctors, we know all about that.
Not that I don't like a good mango body butter or a cocoa shampoo, it's just that Perry obliges. Being with Perry is like a duty, a responsibility of being a real man next to another real one, and surprisingly it doesn't feel unnatural to me. He slaps me on my butt with the charts in the hospital, and I touch his dick through the scrubs when we get off work.
I highly doubt it could ever be anything else: I'm not Turk to weep after sex, and I'm not Elliott to be self-conscious about my body. I guess we just click in bed, me with my fantasies, and Perry with his technique.
Sometimes I try lighting candles and bring in cherry-flavored lube. Unfortunately, it usually coincides with Perry bringing home some ridiculously funny porn and nice imported beers, so we end up laughing on the couch, chugging "Guinness", and having our everyday routine sex (which, mind you, includes pulling my hair, leaving hickeys all over my neck, and some flattering nail marks on Perry's back).
***
'He-he-he-hey Carol, why don't you linger some more discussing your pretty cotillion dress with the Eliza here, and let me be the one and only real doctor around this place?'
Cox is furious, but J.D. stands there for yet another moment, teasing him and arguing with Elliott about shea butter and how it benefits his hair.
It requires him a nice good spank on the butt and a painful tug on his hair to stop talking and start running - only to be caught at the next turn and pulled into a closet.
'Don't you dare bicker so sweetly with anyone else but me,' Cox whispers this right into his lips, right before kissing J.D.
'I'm just messing with you, Perry,' J.D. smiles benevolently and licks his lover's mouth, then hugging Perry's waist and resting his cheek on the broad chest. 'Thank you.'
I thank him very often. I love this man, and for some peculiar reason instead of saying exactly that I love him (which is ne-he-he-he-hever a problem with Turk), I just prefer thanking him for every little gesture of courtesy to our relationship. I mean, come on, it would sound weird to tell him the three pathetic words.
Perry appreciates me more when I tell him about the newest research in pharmacology and advances of nanotech robotics which will someday help us launch tiny little computers right into your bloodstream. He says that my eyes light up like it's Christmas, whenever I get another tiny bit of hope that medicine is not gonna die.
***
'Stop touching me.'
'Newbie, it will pass. I will help you through, but you have to hear me out.'
'Perry, I'm a doctor, I know how to handle...'
'No you don't, you stubborn little brat,' Perry sighs loudly and suddenly hugs him tight, very tight. J.D. almost loses his breath, but it is what he desperately needs, what he's needed for almost a week now. He knows they are only now starting their relationship, and it is, frankly, not the best idea to start dating someone, when your Dad just died, but... but Perry is right. Here. In his gargantuan jersey, with a beer, and Dan is here, and Turk is here, and it feels right to just finally kiss the man who has been putting him on and off the leash for like an eternity.
Of course, Turk screams, and Dan starts cringing, but they kiss as if the world is about to end.
I remember the first time he actually scared me. He scared me to death when he coded.
I never ever thought I would be crying in a hospital, crying my eyes out while hiding in our favorite closet. Even Janitor didn't dare touch me that day - not after seeing me step back and let the Maestro-of-Codes Elliott Reid, MD, do her magic on my coding boyfriend.
I hid for a good half hour, and when I got out, they told me Perry was in recovery. To be honest, I don't remember how I got to his room, I just got there and started kissing him all over. I didn't mind company of a few nurses and Turk, I honestly did not care.
Once he opened his eyes, though, I punched him in the shoulder lightly and threatened to leave his ass on the couch if he was ever to scare me again.
Of course we bickered that night.
The only thing that mattered to me was that he actually whispered to me before falling asleep.
'I love you, J.D.'